Looking forward to going into work this morning. I can just get on and switch off. It's like one step forward and two steps back at the moment. I have been nearly back to my bubbly self during the day but for some frustrating reason, night time, I dread. I can't afford to become an insomniac, but that seems to be the way I'm headed. I refuse to take any pills for it. The worst part is getting up in such a nowty mood. I know exactly why I'm not sleeping, but I'm dealing with things my own way. All I crave is for it all to go away, for these past few months to not have happened. Hell I wish I could talk to people about it. I have been given so many chances, but bottling it up is the only thing I can do. I just close up.

Anyway, I will be absolutely fine in an hour or two. I know someone who will cheer me up later when they come in. :)

On a good note the kids are back at school this week, so it gives me chance to concentrate on me for a change. I need to be alone so desperately.